On Being Alone

“See, that’s the behavior of someone who is afraid of being alone. Which, quite frankly, I just don’t understand. I think I’m pretty great and I love spending time with myself. If you don’t agree, you obviously don’t enjoy the finer things in life and we don’t have much in common.” – My Dad

Sometimes “capable of being alone” seems like the secret to life.

On Empathy

Earlier this week I got a chance to talk to a close family friend about, among other things, the shortsightedness inherent in viewpoints like Gene Marks’ “If I Was a Poor Black Kid”. I heard about the article and decided to talk about here, 1) because the first rule of the internet is to not feed the troll and 2) because as Cord Jefferson points out, the grammar of the headline is almost as offensive as the column itself.

However, as farmers know, bullshit can create fertile ground for good things to grow. Continue reading

Truth from ?uestlove


Of course there are some laws I’ve applied to my life in this lane I’ve decided to travel. 1st and foremost is the only mofos in my circle are people that I CAN LEARN FROM.

I believe THAT is the first and foremost rule to a successful life. you are going to be as educated and successful as the 10 most frequented people you call/text on your phone. seriously. does the truth hurt? is there an oz. of truth to it?

Go check your call log, don’t worry, I’ll wait.


Quote of the Day


A friend pointed out this quote in an ad for Chris Matthews’ show while perusing my Rolling Stone. Thought I’d share it.

“Over time, people who advance liberties tend to win the argument, whether it’s for women, African Americans, immigrants or the gay community. In the end, America takes the side of the people looking for rights. That’s one of the wonders of this country. Eventually, we live up to our ideals.”  – Chris Matthews

I’m really hoping that this is true.

“There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized”

I’m realizing that there is a theme to these “GetItToDamnGether” posts. That theme being that we aren’t who we are in so much as we become who we are and the role our “failures” play in that process.

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“You Don’t Get Shit You Don’t Ask For”

I found a link to this article on Lifehacker (and borrowed their graphic) and it reminded me of something my mom and her sisters always told me growing up, “If you ask, the worst anyone can tell you is no, and even then you haven’t lost anything. You’re right where you started.” I can’t tell you how many times that advice has paid off, applying for grad school, getting clients back when I worked in sales or just getting small favors that have paid off in a major way.

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Internet Round-Up

Attorney General Eric Holder speaks for all of us

“I want to speak directly to Mr. Burns and Mr. Simon: Do another season of ‘The Wire’,” Holder said, drawing laughter and applause from the audience. “That’s actually at a minimum. … If you don’t do a season, do a movie.  We’ve done HBO movies, this is a series that deserves a movie. I want another season or I want a movie. I have a lot of power Mr. Burns and Mr. Simon.”


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6 Life Lessons from The Wire

Lesson 1: If you are willing to let the world see you work a shovel, you might not have to live in shit.

Daniels: “You do what you feel. You wanna pull Avon in on half a case, you go ahead. You wanna put my shit in the street, feel free. But the Eastern had a lot of stories – mine ain’t the only one. A lot of people came through that district. If you were gonna do me, I’d already be done. But there ain’t nothin’ you fear more than a bad headline, is there? You’d rather live in shit than let the world see you work a shovel. You can order warrants, and I’ll serve ’em. But as long as I have days left on those dead wires,this case goes on.

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1000 Times Yes!

Masks by Kewei SHANG via Flikr

Every time I hear Anna Quindlen’s name my ears perk up and I’ve never been disappointed. One of the things I’ve struggled with is the idea of perfection and trying to attain it, Marc Maron talked about this feeling on his podcast and he described it as being so paralyzed by trying to attain perfection that it almost looks and feels like depression or an anxiety attack. On the other side of that coin is Anna Quindlen’s 1999 Commencement Speech to Mt. Holyoke’s Class of 1999. I’m including an excerpt here, but if you haven’t read it before I strongly suggest you check it out.

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The Joy of Letting Go

An idea that has come up multiple times over the past few week is the paralyzing affect decision making can have on one’s life. As one of my profs pointed out, the problem with decisions is that no matter what you decide to do, there is another thing that you decided not to do, and you can never know what would have happened had you done that instead.

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